leplastiquedick:

i’m the mum in the car

catchymemes:

Choose wisely

blackberryshawty:

dimittas:

tooiconic:

dimittas:

travelling-cat-salesman:

klubbhead:

blackberryshawty:

I wish gay republicans knew that being a republican won’t make your father love you

I wish the gays™ knew that whoring around with random older men won’t replace theirs.

aren’t you like 20 years older than your gf lmao

this is the man who posts pictures of him fucking his girlfriend on the same site he posts his children

He has never once posted a photo of him having sex with me. Even if he did, it would mean he can’t ever post a nice photo of him with the kids? What logic is this? lol

oh shit…. sis he cheating

image

What the fuck happened to this post? I love drama tho.

gotitforcheap:
“ I like wearing the camo one because the girl is all “wow chris where is your penis it was right here last time?” and I say “look closer…it’s camo. Also we can’t have sex because I put my dick into dick jail” ”

gotitforcheap:

I like wearing the camo one because the girl is all “wow chris where is your penis it was right here last time?” and I say “look closer…it’s camo. Also we can’t have sex because I put my dick into dick jail”

chlove-art:

batmanisagatewaydrug:

embrasse-mon-clone:

batmanisagatewaydrug:

thepixiepaige:

batmanisagatewaydrug:

napfa:

batmanisagatewaydrug:

I think we’re kind of starting to get away from this but have y’all noticed how in the vast majority of popular media, sex scenes don’t actually tend to involve a lot of talking/fumbling/awkwardness unless it’s for humor or to indicate that the people having sex are a.) probably Wrong for each other somehow or b.) inexperienced, possibly having sex for the first time?

but “good” sex, between people who are experienced and In Love etc, is almost always effortlessly athletic and steamy and they somehow telepathically know exactly what to do. I’m not talking about knowing what their lover enjoys, that’s entirely feasible, but they never even have to coordinate what they’re doing. there’s no “do you want me on top?” or “do you want to do [x]?” or accidentally getting in each other’s way.

the overwhelming message that I’ve always gotten from pop culture is that Good Sex happens without communication and, more dangerously, that needing to communicate is a sign that you’re somehow bad at sex, when in reality that’s almost definitely a sign that you’re, you know, a considerate partner who actually gives a shit about people being comfortable when they have sex with you.  

why doesn’t this have more notes

because I posted it less than 12 hours ago; give it time, friend

Not only that but like, overwhelmingly sex in media is portrayed as this steamy, well-oiled, SERIOUS machine. Like… where’s the fun? Pop culture seems to be so obsessed with this communication-less pantomime of actual intimacy rather than the reality of intimacy going hand in hand with not only consideration but humour and mutual vulnerability.

Sex is by nature so awkward and odd and it NEVER works the way you see in films or on tv. It’s never seamless and perfect and that is not a BAD THING. 

You’re not “doing it wrong” if you’re having problems getting a good rhythm and keep messin’ each other up by trying to help.

You’re not doing it wrong if you’re laughing and talking and not taking it seriously.

And additionally, and now this is a complete tangent from the original point here, but you’re not doing it wrong if you don’t manage to get off or get your partner off.

Sometimes sex is just the action and not the climax and that’s COMPLETELY FINE. My partner and I struggled a LOT with this when we first started having sex because we both had terrible guilt when we couldn’t reach climax or couldn’t get the other off because we felt like that was what the whole point of sex was.

Media puts a lot of PRESSURE on sex and what it looks like that shouldn’t be there and it’s AWFUL.

The focus is just so … wrong. 

hey @thepixiepaige no big but this is the best commentary anyone has ever added to one of my posts

This is such an important post!!! Even as a lesbian, we don’t always get it right. It’s ok, have a giggle & then decide if you both want to continue. My ex and I had amazing sex, and we still had the occasional fumble. One time she jumped off of my face so fast, she pulled a muscle in her groin. Or the time she almost chipped a tooth because I trusted against her face too hard. Ha, and once my fwb was holding me up (while using a strap on) and we fell against a wall and left a dent. So yeah it happens a lot….. And shower sex is always slippery, period sex is always messy(especially when you are both bleeding)

as the op who posted this and someone who’s only had gay sex, I appreciate this addition and YES THIS ABSOLUTELY APPLIES TO GAY COUPLES TOO. sex is weird and awkward and requires communication for EVERYONE of ALL ORIENTATIONS, y'all.

Sex is as varied as people are. 

peppamintkiss:

peppamintkiss:

Okay but have y'all considered 2D getting spit roasted?? Like Murdoc on one side and russel on the other??

No but hear me out tho. Murdoc is fucking thrusting base deep into his ass, claws gripping his hips and leaving angry red marks. While Russel is tangling his big hands into his hair and cupping his chin and gently pushing into his mouth, tickling the back of his throat and whispering praises.

The combination has him squirming and moaning and just fucking melting between them.

jimmybeaulieu:
“ lesly-who:
“  “Weapons of mass destruction”
Sanvers commission
”
Lesly-Who
”

jimmybeaulieu:

lesly-who:

“Weapons of mass destruction”

Sanvers commission

Lesly-Who

chris-giacomettis-left-testicle:

Suck my nuts and call me daddy

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(c)