I’m getting fed up with this whole “feminism as an identity” thing. Time for “feminism as an action.”
So instead of asking “can a feminist do x?” ask “is doing x a feminist action!”
Can a feminist take her husband’s last name? Mu. Null. Question un-valid, please un-ask question.
Is taking your husband’s last name a feminist action? No it isn’t. It doesn’t challenge the patriarchy in anyway, it is the status quo thing to do, it is what is expected of women, and it carries a lot of historical baggage about ownership and shit like that.
But that’s okay, your life choices don’t have to be 100% dictated by your politics unless you want them to. And it’s okay to really want to take his name while recognizing that you also want to do the feminist thing and keep your own, and it’s okay to feel conflicted and have a hard time making the choice. But no more of this enabling “as long as I made the choice myself it is a feminist choice” -bullshit. Own your choices, even the ones that aren’t informed by your feminist politics. You are still a human being and people do shit that contradicts their politics and even interests all the time. Just stop pretending that everything you do is feminist because you are a feminist, that’s not how it works.
^^this is why bell hooks challenges us to say “i support feminist movement” or “i support feminist action” rather than “i am a feminist.” she says that once we say “i am a feminist” and make “feminist” an identity rather than a political movement or a set of beliefs and the actions resulting from those beliefs, we can become complacent and think the battle is over.
No offense to girls who wear makeup,because it really is your choice (one that should be respected) but again, that is literally the status quo thing to do. You are not being feminist for following the expectations of society just because an old guy at your church says you look better without it, because I can almost guarantee that your favorite makeup brand is owned by someone the exact same age making bank on young girls.
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