ihatejonarbuckle:

aries: jon threatening to break garfield’s legs

taurus: jon taunting garfield with a hamburger

gemini: jon using a woman’s amnesia to try to convince her he was an astronaut

cancer: jon threatening to kill odie for eating his last green jellybean

leo: jon getting mad at garfield for not being a dog

virgo: jon taking pleasure in garfield’s hatred of baths

libra: jon forcing garfield to dress as a woman and go on a date with him

scorpio: jon putting a bee in his ass

sagittarius: jon letting garfield get eaten by a bear

capricorn: jon verbally abusing garfield for being lazy

aquarius: jon kissing a sick saint bernard

pisces: jon drinking dog semen

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