hooligan-nova:

the-macra:

crystalsoulslayer:

alphahoennomega:

klubbhead:

electricbreeze:

Schrödinger’s boys

FUCK

What about cracking open a cold milkshake

As we all know, the milkshake brings the boys to the yard. The presence of the boys is a prerequisite for the cracking open of a cold one, but cold ones do not have any inherent boy-attracting abilities. Milkshakes, however, do. All else being equal, the boys would proceed to the milkshake yard. While it is possible to announce the presence of cold ones in the hope of attracting some boys, the pull of the milkshake is much more powerful by comparison.

none of this matters if they’re not back in town though

You fools, the milkshake is the cold one.