worddevourer:

yourplayersaidwhat:

Context: the party is traversing a mountain pass in a blizzard a la Lord of the Rings scene. DM has everyone roll the dice to see if they don’t fall down the cliff, and dwarf warrior in heavy plate armor fails the check. 

DM: Heavy gust of wind pushed you off the path. You slip and fall off the cliff. What do you do?

Dwarf: I flap my arms really really hard.

DM: Seriously?

Dwarf: it’s not like I got better options.

DM: ok, roll the dice.

Dwarf rolls natural 20.

DM: …

Party: …

DM: roll again. 

Dwarf rolls another 20. 

DM: …!

Party: …?!

DM: …sigh. With astonished look on their faces, the party behold a most miraculous sight. A dwarf in heavy armor is slowly rising up in the air above the cliff edge by flapping his arms really really fucking hard. 

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a dwarf should be able to fly.  Its arms are too small to get its sturdy little body off the ground. (And aren’t wings)

The dwarf, of course, flies anyway, because dwarves don’t care what humans think is impossible.

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